House Rules

  1. What we have in writing is what we live by. What is said between parties can be misunderstood or forgotten or missed. If something is critical, then it gets added in writing to the house rules.
  2. The blue trash can is for recycling, and the green one is for trash. Tue is recycling day and trash day. Friday is bulk items day and trash day.
  3. If you have a conflict with party, use non-violent communication (as taught by Marshall Rosenberg) to resolve it. If you cannot work directly with the other party, then enlist a neutral third party. Bring it to the weekly house meeting to ensure it gets resolved.
  4. While interrupting a speaker is not addressed directly in the NVC protocol, if party A is continually interrupting party B, it shows that party A is not listening to party B (save for some grave emergency). Allowing someone to speak and then acknowledging them before speaking is a way to reach agreement. Interruption tends to escalate conflict, not de-escalate it.
  5. Physical violence is grounds for immediate expulsion. This includes threats of physical violence such as throwing something in the direction of someone or making a body feint as if you are about to strike them or promising to physically injure someone. While it is grounds for immediate expulsion, it will not necessarily lead to expulsion. If it occurs 3 times, then there is a high likelihood of expulsion. Not because you are a bad person in need of punishment, but to protect other people and perhaps find a situation which does not induce such behavior.

Weekly Meeting

Meeting opening prayer:

Though there is no separation, we appear to be separate. We enter this house meeting addressing items of conflict in hopes of becoming closer.

Weekly House Meeting Protocol:

  1. We do something to tune into a high vibe – allowing our own smile to bathe us, thinking of how grateful a tree will be for what we did to it,
  2. We remind ourselves of the predominant attiude for the discussion – LOVE
  3. We review new issues (conflicts, house maintenance etc)
  4. We review outstanding issues.
  5. If conflict needs to be resolved, then
    • we do THE EXERCISE – each party writes down their unmet needs and feelings.
    • the participating parties attempt to resolve the issue
    • if the participating parties cannot resolve the issue, then neutral parties experienced in conflict resolution mediate the conflict .
  6. If large-scale decisions need to be made, then they are raised and resolved using “The N-Street Davis Cohousing Method“.
  7. We leave in gratitude

Meeting close

  1. non-serious decisions were spoken:
  2. problems and conflicts for the week are handwritten
  3. serious new rules are added to the house rules in writing.

Meeting closing prayer:

Though there is no separation, we appear to be separate. We close this house meeting addressing items in hopes of becoming closer.